I am not a researcher.

Until a week ago, I had not been a student in over a decade. In fact, I had been the teacher. But I have always been a student of education, particularly elementary education. I am continually learning new strategies and implementing new ideas. Being passionate about making education better is ultimately what drove me to pursue graduate studies.

But, I am not a researcher. As I started to read the assigned book Mindful Inquiry in Social Research, I quickly felt overwhelmed by the language and the content. But I persevered, frequently re-reading sections, and eventually the reading got easier and I was able to start reflecting and anticipating how I might become a researcher. As I read particular sections I became excited and empowered at the prospect of conducting my own research and started to wonder how I might make a significant impact to others, and  ultimately, to myself.

As I continued to read and reflect, two things struck me emotionally. The first was a passage from grad student Linda Ford, where she talks about how understanding the diverse traditions in research can open up our own personal understanding. Before this reading, I usually saw research as something that was done with little emotion or connection to find out something that may or may not be used for anything meaningful depending on the outcome. I identified with, and was inspired to “read about research strategies which aimed at understanding, not explanation, at uncovering meanings instead of observing behaviours, at exploring the person’s experience of events instead of just the events” (Bent & Shapiro, 1998, p. 68-69).  This resonates with my experience as a teacher and building meaningful relationships with students in order to better understand their needs and why they do what they do. I understood her definition of learning vs knowing with learning being outside of oneself and knowing being inside. I began to see that I have been doing research everyday that I have been teaching, and using this knowledge to improve myself and my students learning experience. I am still not able to see myself in the first person as a researcher, but I feel I am closer to that goal as I begin to establish my own set of needs and values as an eventual researcher.

The second thing that struck me was the idea of mindful inquiry. As I read, it all just made sense. The idea that researching in a mindful way allows for openness which can lead to discovering what is there as well as the potential behind what is there already. Many times when I have implemented something new in the classroom, particularly technology based, I had an idea of where I thought the learning would go. Teaching in an environment of inquiry, which is the model in my school, allows openness by teacher and student to pursue directions that were not previously known when the work started. This openness has lead to great learning and discovery by students, both curriculum based and beyond. It has also increased student enjoyment and sense of empowerment as they feel they are a part of their learning journey. I can see how important this openness would be in researching mindfully, allowing both doors and windows to open. Perhaps more difficult, but the potential would seem infinitely more interesting and complex.

I am not a researcher, but I am excited to become one.

Reference:

Bent,V.M., & Shapiro, J. J. (1998). Mindful Inquiry in Social Research. Thousand Oaks, California: Sage.